It starts out a little like a fairytale. A beautiful house. Big fluffy white clouds in the sky. Birds chirping. A gorgeous bride getting ready for her once-in-a-lifetime day. But then, as the day unfolds something goes wrong. Very wrong. This is where the tale changes each and every time. Sometimes, no one can find the groom. Sometimes, I show up and no one there has ever heard of my bride or groom. Sometimes, I show up and the bride doesn’t know who I am. The dream, which probably only lasts minutes, feels like it goes on forever while it’s happening. Each agonizing second. And each time leaves me feeling frantic, panicked, and completely nauseous.

In one version, I run (with all my gear) knocking on every door in the neighborhood asking if anyone has seen the groom. In one of my more epic editions, I try tirelessly to find the right house – like a detective – hopping from clue to clue to try to unravel the mystery behind my couple’s disappearance. In another, I explain to a bewildered bride who I am and frantically try to find details that might help her recall our months of interactions with one another.

Each time, regardless, I awake in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and thanking my lucky stars that it’s over. These agonizing tales used to occur each and every evening. I used to joke that I worked seven weddings a week because it was starting to feel like it. Thankfully, over the last year or two, the dreams have become less and less frequent. First, they tapered off to a couple times a week, then a couple times a month. And, before I knew it I was only having them every few months. In fact, so infrequent that I haven’t had one now for months…. until last night. But last night’s tale? It was a little different. Here goes:

The opening scene began the same way. A beautiful Spring morning. A lovely sunrise. This time, I arrive at the bride’s house and begin shooting (so far, so good). All is well. I’ve been there for a few minutes, chatted with a glowingly excited bride, and begun shooting the details until someone taps me on the shoulder and tells me the ceremony is starting. WHAT!?! But the bride hasn’t even …I turn around and there she is, fully dressed and getting ready to walk down the aisle (which is just outside the room where she was getting dressed – hey, I didn’t say these dreams all made complete sense). THIS IS IT – THIS IS MY FREAK OUT MOMENT. But instead of freaking out, as I feel the panic swelling up into my throat, I take a deep breath and swiftly relocate to begin shooting the ceremony. As I reach into my bag to change to the lens I like to use for the ceremony, I realize my bag is empty. ALL MY LENSES ARE GONE. You know, the ones I was just shooting with moments before when I was shooting her getting ready. They are just gone. The dream, of course, doesn’t explain what happened to them…. all I know at this point is that I do not have them, I didn’t leave them in the room, and that I’m not getting them back.

Normally, this would be the perfect panic moment again. All I have is a 105mm lens on my camera and I’m left with no other options (for those that don’t know about lenses, that’s considered a telephoto lens). But you know what I did in my dream? I took another deep breath, and backed way, way up. I shot the whole thing with my one lens. The ceremony, the portraits, the reception. And you know what? It turned out totally ok. It became a fun, interesting challenge and forced me to see the wedding in a completely different creative perspective. MY NIGHTMARE BECAME A GOOD THING.

I woke up baffled. I woke up feeling empowered. I woke up realizing, maybe just maybe that was my last wedding dream. But, even if it wasn’t, I’m not afraid of them anymore.

When I first met with Dayana and Adam, I knew almost instantly that they were going to be the easiest couple in the world to work with. They were one of those rare couples that barely asked any questions just said “how do we book!?” And, Dayana, with her sweet smile, was so excited at our first meeting that she was having trouble even putting her ideas into words (seriously, this girl is so sweet).

Add all that to the fact that it was going to be Mark and his team from Queen of Hearts Wedding Consultants coordinating this one and I was super pumped. And, on one warm, cloudy May day, Dayana & Adam were married ON A DOCK with a gorgeous lakeside ceremony.

Here are just a few favorites. I tried to narrow it down this time. Honestly, I really did.

Adam helping their adorable little son get ready. And, how cute are those shoes!?

The image on the right is him peeking in on his momma as she gets ready. FAVORITE.

Dayana got a little emotional when she went to sign the ketuba, which was so sweet.

And then a few ceremony favorites!

…and then on to portraits. My favorite part of the day!

One of my favorite moments ever… the moment of the almost kiss.

And then the reception. Seriously, how gorgeous is this house?

Maybe my favorite bouquet toss ever. Brides, this is how you do it.

A huge, huge thank you to Mark and the team from Queen of Hearts for their wonderful hard work, as always.

So does this have you angsting for Spring weather or what? Don’t get me wrong, I’m totally enjoying what little snow we’ve had, but that lake looks miiiiiiighty nice right about now.

Us when we first started dating. I was fifteen, so excuse the hair mess. He was skydiving… which explains the jumpsuit.

Prom my sophomore year of high school. I was sixteen. And, man was I tan… or orange (OMG).
Sidenote: My dress was actually gold, though it looks almost white in this image.

My high school (yes, HIGH SCHOOL) graduation.

Today, we celebrate three years of marriage. Three years. While my mind refuses to accept that so much time has elapsed, my thoughts shift to all that has changed over the last few years. My husband completed monumental steps in his career. I finished my Master’s. We moved across the country. My nephew was born. My brother was married. My maid of honor beat leukemia. I made my passion my career.

When thinking of all these things, the sadness the our wedding day is so far gone completely fades. It has certainly been three whole years. Three long, beautiful, wonderful years. And, I couldn’t be more thankful to have spent them with my very best friend. We’d be incredibly lucky if the next three were half as great as the last three have been.

They are pretty adorable, no?

More soon. I promise.

Don’t get me wrong – I wasn’t running around in my bridesmaid dress and 4-inch heels trying to take photos either. I know when to step back. [Really, I do!] After the wedding was over, I sat back and questioned myself. Did I take too many pictures? Was I too intrusive? Should I have socialized with my friends and family more? While maybe yes to the last one, I don’t regret the way any of it played out. Being heavily involved in the wedding world myself, I know just how annoying the professional-photographer-guest can get [not them all, but many of them - you fellow photographers know what I'm talking about!]. And, I did everything not to be that girl. I kept my flash off at the reception until there was literally no light. Most of the time, I shot from my chair.

But, it was as I uploaded the shots later that night that I realized that I had not one morsel of regret. The smile on my brother’s face as he’s about to kiss his new wife. The joy in my SIL’s eyes as she plays with her nieces. The laughter on my mom’s face as she enjoys her last mother-son dance. These moments melted my heart. The photos from Jenna & Ryan’s wedding photographer are amazing. Like seriously amazing. Yet, I don’t regret what I did. Having captured those moments from my perspective provided me with unmatched satisfaction.

Here is just a sneak peek. Many more to come.
Ryan and Jenna, I love you with all my heart. I feel so blessed to call you family.

Have any of you ever worked at a family wedding? Or not worked and regretted it?